Links

Links:

When I began the blog I promised there would be links and pictures. There are pictures but I haven’t done much with links yet. So here are a few pertinent ones in case you want to look at some of the stuff I talk about. Most of these will have to do with transportation or local government.

Newcastle:

http://www.ci.newcastle.wa.us/index.asp

Washington State DOT: http://www.wsdot.wa.gov/

Sound Transit: http://www.soundtransit.org/

Cougar Mountain Regional Park: http://www.metrokc.gov/parks/parks/cougarmountain.html

Bellevue Parks: http://www.metrokc.gov/parks/parks/cougarmountain.html

And one of the few rules in blogging is that I have absolutely no control over the content of any other site. You go to that site and it’s theirs. For example if you send the WSDOT an email complaining about some remark I made they will send you a $49 ticket for crossing the bridge without paying. It’s their standard answer to all email.

Also, if you’re new to the whole concept of a blog it’s kind of a natural extension of what I’ve been doing. The main difference is anyone who happens to stumble onto it via Google or whatever can read it. With the email version anyone who gets it can forward the email to anyone else. With a blog all you need to send is the URL.

A blog is just a log or diary that’s posted on the web. Blog is short for web log. That’s about all for now; my head is full.

Al

Christine Issues Orders

“In Other News We Turn to the Difficult Life of Britney Spears”:

Leading up to the Iowa Caucuses we kept hearing the smart suave news commentators telling us the results won’t mean much because it’s not a real vote, January weather will effect results, history, blah blah blah. So this morning the same dudes are predicting who will be the next president based on the Iowa results.

On the day the Iowa results are announced everyone is talking about how they knew it would go this way and how it shows what’s going to happen in November what’s next and oh my my. And how does Christine handle it? “The Alaska Way Viaduct needs to be replaced by 2012 or I will tear it down.”

Dang, she must be a Hillary supporter.

Anyway, we only half expect Christine to personally take one of those big orange machines start hacking away at the viaduct. Sure would be entertaining.

To bring us up to date:

· After declaring years ago that we have to replace the viaduct immediately due to earthquake damage we still don’t have an agreeable plan.

· Ron, the King County Executive, wants to replace it with a new viaduct.

· Greg, the mayor, wanted a tunnel instead but that adds about a billion bucks to the cost. Probably a lot more.

· Last year they decided to see how voters felt about it in a “non-binding, completely advisory” vote. They only asked Seattle voters because it has more dead voters or something. But instead of asking “which do you prefer?” they asked two separate questions. So everyone who wanted the replacement voted “yes” to that and “no” to the tunnel. Everyone who wanted the tunnel voted “yes” to that and “no” to the replacement. Everyone who has either already passed away or otherwise didn’t care voted “no” to both questions. So the “no” votes outnumbered the “yes” votes. Politicians couldn’t see how that could happen. Duh. So now everyone is saying the citizens have made their choice clear, and they don’t want either solution, even though the total number of “yes” votes clearly says they WANT A SOLUTION. Sorry, I’ll calm down now.

· So Greg proposed a really cool plan to replace the 6 lane viaduct freeway by installing timed traffic lights on the surface streets. He’s so funny. Have you seen his nightclub act?

· Christine wants it replaced with a new viaduct but will accept a tunnel if Greg can find the extra money (maybe we can grab some of Oregon’s when they’re not looking).

· Christine already has $2.8 billion just waiting to begin work on the Viaduct.

· Several other panic stricken roadway zombies are trying to get that viaduct money and spend it on the Evergreen Point Floating Bridge replacement because they say it’s in more danger. Sissies.

So today Christine says she’s going to demolish the existing structure in 2012 and people better get to work and agree on a replacement plan. Yikes.

I’m still confused about why that “non-binding advisory” vote last year is considered the will of the “people.” As I pointed out the real result is people want a replacement. That’s clear. It’s like asking a class of 10th graders “How many want to go to the park?” and then “How many want to go to the beach?” And then announcing, “You kids seem indecisive so we’ll just stay here and study.”

Why did that vote only involve Seattle people? Oh, yeah, it was advisory and non-binding so there was no reason to involve everyone who would eventually have to pay for it. Don’t want to wake up the whole neighborhood just to check which way the wind is blowing.

Oh, and what about Britney? I don’t care!

Al

Great! The Glitches Are In Charge Now:

Great! The Glitches Are In Charge Now:

Previously we mentioned that the bus tunnel in Seattle that connects Newcastle to the King Street Station was shut down for over a week due to a “computer glitch.” Well, it’s happened again. The fireworks on top of the Space Needle were boofed up due to the “computer glitch.” Reporters don’t have a clue why some things don’t work so they blame the computer glitch.

A professional pyrotechnician group put a ton of fireworks on top of the Space Needle and connected them to a PC. It was planned to be a coordinated show with fire and music beginning at midnight Pacific Standard Time. This same team has been doing this for 14 years. They used the same control software as the last few years but with a new computer running the Winders Vista operating system. What could possibly go wrong?

Vista: “It looks like you’re trying to set off fireworks. Would you like help with that?”

Pyrotechnician: Clicks; NO.

Vista: “Are you sure you want to light that fuse?”

Pyrotechnician: Clicks; OK.

Vista: “Click ‘OK’ again to download ActiveX Control.”

Pyro: “The music has started – get on with it!”

Vista: “Please wait……………”

Pyro: “Crap, I’ll light it myself.”

Vista: “I wouldn’t do that; please wait………….”

Pyro: “We have a schedule and we ran this sequence over and over to get the timing just right!” Clicks; OK Dammit (an undocumented button).

Vista: “Just for that we’re downloading a critical update and will automatically reboot your system.”

Pyro: “Fine! But you better be quick because the next rocket is aimed at Redmond.” And goes out on the roof to light the fuses.

The music finished way before the fireworks.

In other news: Shortly after the fireworks ended a personal computer loudly glitched into the parking lot near the Space Needle early on New Years Night. Nobody was injured but the PC was a total loss. Looks like Apple is about to sell another Mac.

Al

Another Personal Freedom Falls

Another Personal Freedom Falls:

Starting today, January 2, 2008, we won’t be allowed to “text” whilst driving. That means sending a text message via cell phone behind the wheel. What better reason could we have for taking the bus or train? Personally I don’t think I can spend more than ten minutes behind the wheel without the overwhelming urge to text. It’s an obsession. Wait, is that “obcession?” No, I guess not.

So here’s my plan: first learn new lingo for texting. They shorten phrases that get used often to a few letters. For example “bite me” would just be BM. That could mean a couple of other things just as appropriate. It’s all in how you read it. And I need to subscribe to some of those internet happy face symbols that depict emotions. The goal is to reduce my text messages to a series of letters and symbols so that I can send an entire note in mere seconds. Because, if there’s one goal in this life it’s to do something illegal without getting caught. Certainly not actual communication. Right?

To help catch naughty drivers Seattle is installing red light photo boxes at 24 “more” intersections. If you’re texting and don’t notice the light is red you may scoot through the intersection. Click! You get a ticket in the mail for $101. It’s going to cost a million bucks to do all 24 intersections but the city says the ones already installed have paid for themselves two and a half times. For those of you who haven’t passed the WASL it means a good deal. We don’t know if they’ll actually analyze the photos to see if the driver was doing something other than driving but they could.

That sets up a challenge sport. Here’s how it would work. You get a witness or two in the car and they make a list of all the stupid stuff you do that you shouldn’t. Like eating a taco, applying makeup, phoning ET, brushing your cat, and texting… The one who wins is the one that does the most stupid stuff while running the red light and does NOT get a ticket in the mail. Losers have to pay the $101 and take the WASL again. Oh, and if you have a wreck, you lose by default.

This is yet another good reason to take the bus. One possible outcome is that you lose your license which means you have to ride the bus anyway, so you might as well get used to it. I’ll see you at the Lake Boren Transit Center where I’ll wave as I drive on the newly opened Coal Creek Parkway. Wait, is waving still legal?

Al

Pass the Waffles, Please

Washington state, home of Bigfoot and Glen the Lake Boren Carp, has imposed a condition on our school kids. In order to qualify as a edgicated person they have to pass the WASL – (Washington Assessment of Student Learning), apparently pronounced “waffle.” This test “measures student learning of the state’s academic standards” and I want to say those are some pretty good standards. For example the Washington State DOT thinks an 18% error rate is just dandy for issuing $49 tickets to drivers on the new bridge. New math.

Have you come face to face with a recent HS grad at Wendy’s? If the cash register tells them your change is 63 cents it takes them 10 minutes to figure out how many quarters that is. So maybe the Superintendent of Public Instruction has a point. This brings up the title of the test. If we’re testing student learning doesn’t that mean we’re testing how the teachers are doing? To me this is really bass ackwards.

First we should make a point of adequately funding the schools and paying teachers so better educated people from other states will come and train our kids. Because it’s hard to teach gooder if half your mind is focused on food stamps and rent and the other half is focused on inadequate school supplies and heat in the danged classroom.

See? I could pass the WASL because I was able to use two forms of the word "adequate" correctly in the same paragraph. Pretty smart.

Parents are really annoyed with the WASL. They want little Billy to graduate so they can pay some large university to baby sit him for the next four years. It doesn’t seem to occur to them that the baby sitting won’t last very long if Billy can’t read. But if Billy can’t pass the WASL he won’t graduate.

So what have parents done to help the little tyke pass? Sue the state to abolish the test. And little Billy ends up living with them because he can’t find a job. But the parents feel righteous because they voted “NO” on every proposal to improve schools and their little genius has a high school diploma. Bravo.

OK, is there a point here? I don’t know. Oh, yeah, in Civics Class we learned that in order for society to work members have to participate in funding. We call it taxes. Sure, it can be annoying but so is the dentist. If you never go to the dentist you may not be able to chew your food at some point. And if you don’t pay taxes you don’t get roads, schools, police, and congress.

And that’s about where it all starts to fall apart. If I could draw of picture of how this really works I’d be a famous artist because it’s very abstract and four dimensional. So to keep my head from exploding I need focus on plans for a rapid transit station on the shimmering shores of Lake Boren.

My waffle question to you is: If a train leaves Boston going west at 24 mph toward Cincinnati and another train leaves Winnemucca going east at 36 mph toward Cleveland will they ever be in Ohio at the same time? Why? Who wants to go to Ohio? When do we leave?

For extra credit: What if a train left Seattle at 72 mph headed for Oklahoma City with the Sonics’ basketball team? Well what about it?!? Would it pass through Ohio? Could we catch it and make them come back? Film at 11. Oh, and show your work.

Al