Once the boat is registered and the TSA, FBI, and CSI are all informed of your criminal background you can go for a boat ride.
Skip it. Don’t do it. The world has not returned to an even keel (boating reference) so you aren’t going to get away with it. You need to do some stuff first.
Basically the next step is to apply the registration numbers to the sides of the boat. It’s a rusted aluminum boat. “How can aluminum rust?” you might say. “It does” is pretty much what Indiana boaters would answer.
See, here’s the thing. A boat with a checkered past already has a registration number and an annual permit sticker. The latest one is dated 1995. It’s like the annual license plate appliqué except it’s much bigger. You have to remove it.
Removal of the past is very similar to removing a personal past you may not be proud of: it takes lots of hard work. In this case it took a putty knife, paint scraper, Swiss Army knife, and several illegal chemicals.
Unfortunately the paint went away with the old numbers. I chose yellow as my registration number color because the old rowboat was green. Seemed like a good contrast. The game warden sits on a bridge and looks at boats with binoculars. The registration number should show up good. Yellow does not show up good against bare aluminum. Toxic chemicals removed the green paint and the yellow numbers now blend in with the bare aluminum background. Guess what happened next?
No, you’re wrong. Indiana game wardens are looking for drunks. Drinking on a boat is pretty much the primary crime and your boat registration number is only relevant if you’re driving your boat like a drunken sailor. Old bald guys with four horse motors don’t rate a second look.
Why did I bother to register my boat then? Well, ummm, OK, why? “Law and Order,” that’s why. Suppose somebody, say a pontoon boat load of Amish, were to commit some crime on the high seas. The Game Warden has to investigate. If he/she finds a feral rowboat with a four horse motor it goes in the report. Years later I might have to explain it. I don’t like explaining stuff; particularly when my explanation requires me to make stuff up. It’s hard work.
And that’s the point: why go to a lot of trouble when you can simply glue a number on the side of the boat and avoid making up more stuff?
Well, it’s not that easy. You can buy a kit of 1143 sticky numbers, letters, and special characters. But do you know anyone who can glue a string of numbers on the side of a boat all even and correctly spaced? Me neither.
It turns out you can go to a marina (up scale, of course) and show your registration paper and they will make you a perfect set numbers for your boat, perfectly spaced and everything. It all goes on in one easy step. OK four easy steps, but the result looks professional.
They have these NC machines (NC means “Computer”) and plotter/cutter devices that can produce a perfect set of registration numbers. You take that set of numbers back to the boat and apply it like a decal or fake tattoo.
Nothing could be easier. OK, a couple of things are easier, but applying registration numbers is right up there.
The hard part is removing the old numbers. The paint goes with them.
Oh, and another hard part is getting them right side up. If you sit in the boat leaning over the side the odds are 50-50 it will be upside down.
Think about it. There you are, novice boat owner, your first registration numbers, and your first putty knife. Would things go perfect? Hell no.
Here’s the challenge: explain to the Game Warden that you are completely sober, were not fishing (even though there are a couple of dead fish in the boat), and have a legal, bono fide, registration for this exact boat. And all your proof is back at the dock. If you can do that you’re a true boater. If not you lose your boat. They take it away.
Where was I? Oh, yeah. Got the perfect set of numbers all spaced correctly and ready to apply. Cleaned off the old numbers and paint (dangit) where the new numbers were to go. In an amazing burst of clear thinking the new numbers are right side up. Don’t know how that happened.
Then the 2009/2010 permit sticker went on. That way I’m good well into next year. It’s practically magic. Don’t count on it.
The first trip on the river began on a clear evening, not a cloud in the sky. The weather people said there was a 50% chance of rain the following day. Given these clues can you guess what happened? We got soaked.
The deal is you have to get at least 30 minutes from the dock under clear skys. The next thing is it rains. Clear skys don’t count. Weather reports don’t count. It only matters that you’re at least 30 minutes away from any shelter. That’s a key number. Remember it. Next time you go out in an open boat in Indiana without rain gear set a timer for 29 minutes and head back. Trust me.
On the other hand, Indiana weather is also around 90 degrees on a “clear” summer night. So a little rain is welcome. It gives you a chance to watch those yellow numbers floating by in the water as you glide toward the dock.
Al
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Hardened criminals in Indiana
Let’s say you have a 30 year old rowboat that you are tired of rowing and would like to find a new way to make it go. That might be a five horse motor or a younger person to row for you.
What if this boat happens to be located around the Indiana area? It could happen, don’t be so skeptical.
Indiana requires a boat to be registered before it can be powered. Even if the power is a younger person rowing – unless it’s a relative and then I guess it’s OK.
A motor requires boat registration. Maybe that’s because Indiana has a horse law – anything that’s referred to as having “horse power” is a horse and therefore must have documents.
Where do we get these alleged documents? License Bureau. The state requires it so you go where the public directly interacts with the state. Man, even asking where shows you’re in for a long day.
Visiting the state license office is kind of a trick. See, Indiana is also out of money so they closed several of these license offices. That means everyone who needs to visit the state has only a few remaining locations.
When you finally find one you need to take a number. “Now serving Number 47” and your ticket is number 259. Don’t worry, it goes fast. 259 will be served by Thursday.
At the head of the line you announce that you have this rowboat that you’d like to power with a five horse motor. Fingerprints! The clerk asks the obvious question: “Do you now or have you ever had fingerprints?”
You answer in a non-committal way, “Maybe, why do you ask?”
This is mistake number one. Never try to evade a question asked by an Indiana State Government Employee. Wait, maybe it’s “Always ignore any question and repeat your first request.” Yeah that’s it.
The state employee patiently explains in small words and slow delivery that you need a birth certificate, Social Security card, and driver’s license from at least three different states or she’s calling the Indiana State Police.
You proudly announce in a voice that fills the whole room that you possess one of those new Washington State Enhanced Driver’s Licenses which you legally obtained with all of the above documents plus a note from President Obama saying it’s a matter of National Security and therefore it takes the place of that other stuff.
The clerk becomes even more patient and explains that Indiana does not recognize Washington as a state and showing a license from Washington State may get you arrested.
“Umm, Ok, sorry, just give me the forms and I’ll fill them out and bring them back whenever you say, your highness.” And the clerk says, “That’s better, and get a haircut, we have standards in Indiana.”
The trick here is to take these words of wisdom from this clerk and rethink your approach. Then locate another license office and try again. Right?
At the next place the clerk, who looks very much like the first one, Uses the “Force” to ask you point blank if you are trying to commit fraud. “We don’t take kindly to folks from the wild west here in Indiana.” You meekly admit that you were trying to fool Indiana into taking the $20 registration fee so you could put a five horse motor on an old rowboat and rob a bank. “Please forgive me.”
The clerk says everything will be fine if you call a police officer to come over and inspect the boat. The officer is the only person capable of copying the registration number onto a piece of paper. No ordinary American can do that.
Fine. You take that experience to the third license office (no other places in Indiana allow the public to speak with an actual state employee). Armed with the knowledge gained from the first two encounters you are pretty sure you have enough answers to satisfy the clerk at the third place. How hard could it be?
Well it was harder than the first two. The main issue was the third clerk couldn’t keep a straight face. Each time she (better looking than the first two but a definite family resemblance) tells you about some obscure and irrelevant requirement she giggles.
You finally accept the fact that some kind of police officer has to inspect the boat and copy the registration number on a sheet of paper. You briefly consider forging a police officer signature but realize that might be worse that the crime of putting a five horse motor on an unregistered $20 rowboat. So you finally accept the inevitable and call the local Sherriff.
The person who answers the phone has a voice surprisingly like all three of the license clerks and very clearly informs you, the caller, that she is only interested in your name and phone number. She could care less who claims to own the boat, the property owner where the boat is located, or anyone else involved in the boat registration conspiracy – she only cares who called her. Maybe that’s normal. That would be a first in this saga.
Then she says a deputy will be out within 48 hours to look at the boat and sign the magic paper that will eventually allow you to mount a five horse motor on your $20 boat. Oh, and the fee will be $20. That’s because there are no boats worth less than $100 and the fee is 20%. That’s government logic, so don’t question it.
Officer Brian arrives the next day. You could have knocked me over with a feather. I never expected they would actually do it. Anyway, Officer Brian stops by and fills out the paper in 27 seconds, signs it, and leaves. Doesn’t even knock on the door or turn on the lights and siren; just takes care of it and scrams.
So now we have this paper signed by an officer of the law. Now what? Well we take it back to the three clerks and get the boat registered.
Now for the hard part. The registration numbers on the boat have to be exactly what they say, size, color, placement, and applied with a specific glue that’s only approved for use in a marine environment in Indiana.
Are we intimidated? Of course. Just wait until the game warden spots this high crime motor launch cruising across a lake at 2.5 mph sporting a five horse turbo inducted mega flop power unit. We’ll all go to jail.
But we paid the $20 fee. So, everything’s OK. Never mind.
Besides, Indiana says people over 65 can fish without a license. OK, never mind again. People over 65 can put a five horse motor on an unregistered rowboat. And Indiana allows people over 65 to sign official documents as if they were police officers. That’s because Indiana is such a hard place to live that anyone who reaches 65 must have super powers and nobody wants to mess with them. It’s just those frontier hooligans from Washington State with their fake “Enhanced Driver’s Licenses” that they need to keep down.
Al
What if this boat happens to be located around the Indiana area? It could happen, don’t be so skeptical.
Indiana requires a boat to be registered before it can be powered. Even if the power is a younger person rowing – unless it’s a relative and then I guess it’s OK.
A motor requires boat registration. Maybe that’s because Indiana has a horse law – anything that’s referred to as having “horse power” is a horse and therefore must have documents.
Where do we get these alleged documents? License Bureau. The state requires it so you go where the public directly interacts with the state. Man, even asking where shows you’re in for a long day.
Visiting the state license office is kind of a trick. See, Indiana is also out of money so they closed several of these license offices. That means everyone who needs to visit the state has only a few remaining locations.
When you finally find one you need to take a number. “Now serving Number 47” and your ticket is number 259. Don’t worry, it goes fast. 259 will be served by Thursday.
At the head of the line you announce that you have this rowboat that you’d like to power with a five horse motor. Fingerprints! The clerk asks the obvious question: “Do you now or have you ever had fingerprints?”
You answer in a non-committal way, “Maybe, why do you ask?”
This is mistake number one. Never try to evade a question asked by an Indiana State Government Employee. Wait, maybe it’s “Always ignore any question and repeat your first request.” Yeah that’s it.
The state employee patiently explains in small words and slow delivery that you need a birth certificate, Social Security card, and driver’s license from at least three different states or she’s calling the Indiana State Police.
You proudly announce in a voice that fills the whole room that you possess one of those new Washington State Enhanced Driver’s Licenses which you legally obtained with all of the above documents plus a note from President Obama saying it’s a matter of National Security and therefore it takes the place of that other stuff.
The clerk becomes even more patient and explains that Indiana does not recognize Washington as a state and showing a license from Washington State may get you arrested.
“Umm, Ok, sorry, just give me the forms and I’ll fill them out and bring them back whenever you say, your highness.” And the clerk says, “That’s better, and get a haircut, we have standards in Indiana.”
The trick here is to take these words of wisdom from this clerk and rethink your approach. Then locate another license office and try again. Right?
At the next place the clerk, who looks very much like the first one, Uses the “Force” to ask you point blank if you are trying to commit fraud. “We don’t take kindly to folks from the wild west here in Indiana.” You meekly admit that you were trying to fool Indiana into taking the $20 registration fee so you could put a five horse motor on an old rowboat and rob a bank. “Please forgive me.”
The clerk says everything will be fine if you call a police officer to come over and inspect the boat. The officer is the only person capable of copying the registration number onto a piece of paper. No ordinary American can do that.
Fine. You take that experience to the third license office (no other places in Indiana allow the public to speak with an actual state employee). Armed with the knowledge gained from the first two encounters you are pretty sure you have enough answers to satisfy the clerk at the third place. How hard could it be?
Well it was harder than the first two. The main issue was the third clerk couldn’t keep a straight face. Each time she (better looking than the first two but a definite family resemblance) tells you about some obscure and irrelevant requirement she giggles.
You finally accept the fact that some kind of police officer has to inspect the boat and copy the registration number on a sheet of paper. You briefly consider forging a police officer signature but realize that might be worse that the crime of putting a five horse motor on an unregistered $20 rowboat. So you finally accept the inevitable and call the local Sherriff.
The person who answers the phone has a voice surprisingly like all three of the license clerks and very clearly informs you, the caller, that she is only interested in your name and phone number. She could care less who claims to own the boat, the property owner where the boat is located, or anyone else involved in the boat registration conspiracy – she only cares who called her. Maybe that’s normal. That would be a first in this saga.
Then she says a deputy will be out within 48 hours to look at the boat and sign the magic paper that will eventually allow you to mount a five horse motor on your $20 boat. Oh, and the fee will be $20. That’s because there are no boats worth less than $100 and the fee is 20%. That’s government logic, so don’t question it.
Officer Brian arrives the next day. You could have knocked me over with a feather. I never expected they would actually do it. Anyway, Officer Brian stops by and fills out the paper in 27 seconds, signs it, and leaves. Doesn’t even knock on the door or turn on the lights and siren; just takes care of it and scrams.
So now we have this paper signed by an officer of the law. Now what? Well we take it back to the three clerks and get the boat registered.
Now for the hard part. The registration numbers on the boat have to be exactly what they say, size, color, placement, and applied with a specific glue that’s only approved for use in a marine environment in Indiana.
Are we intimidated? Of course. Just wait until the game warden spots this high crime motor launch cruising across a lake at 2.5 mph sporting a five horse turbo inducted mega flop power unit. We’ll all go to jail.
But we paid the $20 fee. So, everything’s OK. Never mind.
Besides, Indiana says people over 65 can fish without a license. OK, never mind again. People over 65 can put a five horse motor on an unregistered rowboat. And Indiana allows people over 65 to sign official documents as if they were police officers. That’s because Indiana is such a hard place to live that anyone who reaches 65 must have super powers and nobody wants to mess with them. It’s just those frontier hooligans from Washington State with their fake “Enhanced Driver’s Licenses” that they need to keep down.
Al
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
New Technologies
Twitter Twitter Don’t Be Bitter – Whacha doin, where ya at?
Twattle Twottle Hit The Bottle – Let’s meet later for to chat!
Brilliant tweet – less than 140 characters. So I deleted my Twitter account. Here’s why. Why? In other words; why on earth would I want to (on a trip to the drug store, for example) stop and waste my time punching one character at a time into my smart phone to tell hundreds of complete strangers I’m at Rite Aid?
Maybe somebody cares. I doubt it. But there’s a real benefit of Twitter. Millions of people get to say “What’s Twitter” all at the same time. That’s social networking, dude.
OK, maybe you don’t know what it is. It’s a kind of widget that can be accessed from any internet enabled device, such as a cell phone, iPod, laptop, or pretty much any gizmo. Actual benefits could include communication within workgroups, coordination between mobile units such as delivery vans, and managing the daily “who’s where now?” A group that shares resources might find it handy. Shared resources could be cars, dinner, house keys, or college class notes. From that standpoint it might be a good thing to be able to punch a key and see if you have to change your immediate plans. The obvious advantage over the phone is that A) many people can get the same messages without playing the old phone round robin and B) people who live on the phone miss calls. Besides the battery might go dead.
See it could be real handy for a person to simply send out a quick tweet saying “Heading home now, ETA 5:15.” And several hungry people might need to know that. Or the boss might send out a quick tweet saying “Heads up! suits from HQ at 2:00! LOOK BUSY!” Of course the suits might read it and show up at 1:30.
For a simple minded retired person it could be generally useful if all the other simple minded retired folks used it. Here’s how it works: a person can set up a number of users to “follow.” And all of those persons could “follow” the first person. So they all see whatever any one of them tweets. Which means you can load up the bike at 8:00 am and spend the whole day thumbing tweet messages and never get around to actually riding. So it’s a good thing.
The problem is you need to be young and agile in order to actually set up a useful group of followers and they all need to agree to have an internet capable device. Many of us don’t even turn on the cell phone and some don’t have one. Many more of us wouldn’t know how to catch the internet out of thin air anyway, so you’d have to train them. Don’t try. The process of keying in a phone number and then hitting the “send” button is on the technical frontier for me.
What else is technically beyond the reach of many Americans? Well the Greater Newcastle area transportation cabal (Sound Transit) has instituted something called the ORCA card. It’s an RFID enabled credit card size thingy that you can use for transit. It allegedly works on any public bus, trolley, ferry, or rickshaw. The tech savvy card holder just taps the spot and the ride fee is deducted from an account. The account can be funded manually, via Twitter, or you can set up a credit card automatic withdrawal.
This seems like a good idea. The Sound Transit area has seven transportation systems and many people might have to use two of three every day. Thus it would be quite an improvement to use one simple payment method for all of them. If it works. Here’s a hint – technology doesn’t work.
Some employers subsidize commuters who agree not to drive to work. Companies are encouraged to do this because they don’t need to provide parking for everyone. Transit people want them to do it in order to get riders. And the cities also provide some encouragement as a way to reduce congestion and street parking hassles. The feds like it to help lower pollution caused by every person driving a Hummer to work.
But remember the “Good-to-Go” pass for the new toll bridge? The state thought an 18% error rate meant it was working pretty well. Let’s hope the ORCA card can beat that. Oh, and you happen to be 65+ or disabled you have to go to the Customer Service Center to get a “reduced rate” card. Please have correct change ready.
Al
Twattle Twottle Hit The Bottle – Let’s meet later for to chat!
Brilliant tweet – less than 140 characters. So I deleted my Twitter account. Here’s why. Why? In other words; why on earth would I want to (on a trip to the drug store, for example) stop and waste my time punching one character at a time into my smart phone to tell hundreds of complete strangers I’m at Rite Aid?
Maybe somebody cares. I doubt it. But there’s a real benefit of Twitter. Millions of people get to say “What’s Twitter” all at the same time. That’s social networking, dude.
OK, maybe you don’t know what it is. It’s a kind of widget that can be accessed from any internet enabled device, such as a cell phone, iPod, laptop, or pretty much any gizmo. Actual benefits could include communication within workgroups, coordination between mobile units such as delivery vans, and managing the daily “who’s where now?” A group that shares resources might find it handy. Shared resources could be cars, dinner, house keys, or college class notes. From that standpoint it might be a good thing to be able to punch a key and see if you have to change your immediate plans. The obvious advantage over the phone is that A) many people can get the same messages without playing the old phone round robin and B) people who live on the phone miss calls. Besides the battery might go dead.
See it could be real handy for a person to simply send out a quick tweet saying “Heading home now, ETA 5:15.” And several hungry people might need to know that. Or the boss might send out a quick tweet saying “Heads up! suits from HQ at 2:00! LOOK BUSY!” Of course the suits might read it and show up at 1:30.
For a simple minded retired person it could be generally useful if all the other simple minded retired folks used it. Here’s how it works: a person can set up a number of users to “follow.” And all of those persons could “follow” the first person. So they all see whatever any one of them tweets. Which means you can load up the bike at 8:00 am and spend the whole day thumbing tweet messages and never get around to actually riding. So it’s a good thing.
The problem is you need to be young and agile in order to actually set up a useful group of followers and they all need to agree to have an internet capable device. Many of us don’t even turn on the cell phone and some don’t have one. Many more of us wouldn’t know how to catch the internet out of thin air anyway, so you’d have to train them. Don’t try. The process of keying in a phone number and then hitting the “send” button is on the technical frontier for me.
What else is technically beyond the reach of many Americans? Well the Greater Newcastle area transportation cabal (Sound Transit) has instituted something called the ORCA card. It’s an RFID enabled credit card size thingy that you can use for transit. It allegedly works on any public bus, trolley, ferry, or rickshaw. The tech savvy card holder just taps the spot and the ride fee is deducted from an account. The account can be funded manually, via Twitter, or you can set up a credit card automatic withdrawal.
This seems like a good idea. The Sound Transit area has seven transportation systems and many people might have to use two of three every day. Thus it would be quite an improvement to use one simple payment method for all of them. If it works. Here’s a hint – technology doesn’t work.
Some employers subsidize commuters who agree not to drive to work. Companies are encouraged to do this because they don’t need to provide parking for everyone. Transit people want them to do it in order to get riders. And the cities also provide some encouragement as a way to reduce congestion and street parking hassles. The feds like it to help lower pollution caused by every person driving a Hummer to work.
But remember the “Good-to-Go” pass for the new toll bridge? The state thought an 18% error rate meant it was working pretty well. Let’s hope the ORCA card can beat that. Oh, and you happen to be 65+ or disabled you have to go to the Customer Service Center to get a “reduced rate” card. Please have correct change ready.
Al
Saturday, June 6, 2009
Naming Stuff Ain't That Hard
Most of my blog posts have to do with local idiosyncrasies and fun stuff like city council decisions. I like to read the rags and see what they think is going on. Basically I am super skeptical of “news” as written in a newspaper or spoken on radio or pie charted on the TeeVees. This is because my youth was spent falling for innumerable hoaxes and half truths. I’m not cured of naiveté and I still fall for stuff because I basically think people try to be honest. Not news people, though.
The problem is when I was a semi youth I witnessed a national news crew manufacture “news” in order to get a dramatic film clip in hopes it would get before the American public at dinner time (1967). That burned me. “News clips” are now forever suspect.
If news film is fake how in the world can we trust what reporters tell us? So I shy away from national news because I know in order to get a job in that strata you need to be a real slick operator. Thus it’s not for me.
Sure, I watch the “news” and digest the gist of what they say is going on. I can listen to speeches and take in a debate or two but I still don’t really care to believe it’s more than half real. It all depends on how the result influences my life. And, I want to say that less than one percent interest on my savings is a tremendous influence and I don’t like it one bit.
The point is you rarely see anything in the Lake Boren Rapid Transit Report about national level news. We know the feds (American taxpayers) are helping to pay for a lot of transportation public works projects. Just look at the number of people standing around watching one guy work. Pretty clear.
In my previous post I invited readers to let me know what they want to read about. Sometimes I just write stuff because it gives me a fun way to remind everyone that I’m retired and don’t actually have to work on anything. If only I could use that as the guiding principal of my life. Some nights I feel more worn out than when I used to work. Tetris can be very difficult.
What does this have to do with anything? Well let me think…. Nothing. Oh wait, I know; one of my primary and most enjoyable hobbies is to go around and look at what’s going on locally (to wherever I happen to be at the time) in the way of municipal and transportation projects.
Roads, transit, and vermin control are among my top interests. Particularly if it involves rails.
Which is why this is called the Lake Boren Rapid Transit Report: what the heck has Lake Boren to do with rapid transit??? Well it’s important.
Lake Boren is one of only two in the entire world with that name. The other one is in Sweden and it’s actually a wide part of a waterway canal. Thus people around here had a stroke of genius naming this little piss hole something unique.
Carson Boren was a bearded grouchy looking SOB who was one of the original settlers of Seattle. http://www.historylink.org/index.cfm?displaypage=output.cfm&file_id=1936 He was a member of the Denny party in 1851. Carson Boren was born in 1824 and died in 1912. He would not have approved of the new sign at Lake Boren Park.
In 1852 Carson (not Johnny) Boren and a guy named William Bell paddled across Elliott Bay to the present site of Seattle. Arthur Denny rode along but didn’t paddle because he was using a horseshoe and string for depth sounding. That’s why the Seattle founders are called the “Denny Party” – Denny was the one who didn’t work therefore he must be in charge…
Carson Boren became King County’s first sheriff. He was followed by a long line of distinguished sheriffy like folks including a Congress person named Dave Reichert or something. He looked better in a uniform.
We don’t know how King County got its original name but we know it’s now named after Martin Luther King Jr. The county name came about long before MLK was born. Want extra credit? Tell me how this happened.
Carson Boren died in 1912 in Woodinville. Really. But it wasn’t called Woodinville at that time. They must have named it because of the dead people or something. I don’t know. Don’t quote me on that.
Anyway, Carson was a known recluse and didn’t really like other members of his species. That’s probably why he wandered around so much. He had a wife or two and some kids so his dislike of people had limits.
I have not yet found out why they named a pond after him or why they insist on calling it a lake. But I do know it’s pretty and Glen, the Lake Boren Carp, enjoys living in it. Although lately he’s been seen more often in Elliott Bay chasing ferry boats. Maybe you’ve seen the reports on the national Teevee news. He’s checking for leaks.
Carson Boren was born in Nashville, Tennessee which is a town I’ve never been to. I don’t have a real desire to go there since I understand you can hear the ghost of Jonny Cash. I always disliked that guy. Now I’ve transferred that to Joaquin Phoenix because he played Cash in that awful movie. I’m so fickle.
If anyone has any idea why they named Lake Boren please let me know. I won’t believe you but it’s worth a try. Also, can you explain what Joaquin Phoenix as trying to do on Letterman? What a chump.
Well, you probably thought I knew nothing historical or, if you’ve been reading this blog you probably wondered if any of it was connected. Now you know. Seattle was founded by a few intrepid explorers who landed at Alki Beach and forgot how to get back to civilization.
These explorers provided a plethora of names for local landmarks, streets, and so on, yet we still often see stuff named Westlake, Eastlake, Westlake Center, South Center, North Gate, Overlake and so on. Newcastle even uses a name that was already used here twice before and lots of times elsewhere.
Come on people, we have hundreds of pioneers and even some in between people with good names to call stuff. For example I know of a real nice spot east of Chinook Pass that would benefit greatly from the name “Showalter Falls.” It’s fickle like me and quits in August.
Al
The problem is when I was a semi youth I witnessed a national news crew manufacture “news” in order to get a dramatic film clip in hopes it would get before the American public at dinner time (1967). That burned me. “News clips” are now forever suspect.
If news film is fake how in the world can we trust what reporters tell us? So I shy away from national news because I know in order to get a job in that strata you need to be a real slick operator. Thus it’s not for me.
Sure, I watch the “news” and digest the gist of what they say is going on. I can listen to speeches and take in a debate or two but I still don’t really care to believe it’s more than half real. It all depends on how the result influences my life. And, I want to say that less than one percent interest on my savings is a tremendous influence and I don’t like it one bit.
The point is you rarely see anything in the Lake Boren Rapid Transit Report about national level news. We know the feds (American taxpayers) are helping to pay for a lot of transportation public works projects. Just look at the number of people standing around watching one guy work. Pretty clear.
In my previous post I invited readers to let me know what they want to read about. Sometimes I just write stuff because it gives me a fun way to remind everyone that I’m retired and don’t actually have to work on anything. If only I could use that as the guiding principal of my life. Some nights I feel more worn out than when I used to work. Tetris can be very difficult.
What does this have to do with anything? Well let me think…. Nothing. Oh wait, I know; one of my primary and most enjoyable hobbies is to go around and look at what’s going on locally (to wherever I happen to be at the time) in the way of municipal and transportation projects.
Roads, transit, and vermin control are among my top interests. Particularly if it involves rails.
Which is why this is called the Lake Boren Rapid Transit Report: what the heck has Lake Boren to do with rapid transit??? Well it’s important.
Lake Boren is one of only two in the entire world with that name. The other one is in Sweden and it’s actually a wide part of a waterway canal. Thus people around here had a stroke of genius naming this little piss hole something unique.
Carson Boren was a bearded grouchy looking SOB who was one of the original settlers of Seattle. http://www.historylink.org/index.cfm?displaypage=output.cfm&file_id=1936 He was a member of the Denny party in 1851. Carson Boren was born in 1824 and died in 1912. He would not have approved of the new sign at Lake Boren Park.
In 1852 Carson (not Johnny) Boren and a guy named William Bell paddled across Elliott Bay to the present site of Seattle. Arthur Denny rode along but didn’t paddle because he was using a horseshoe and string for depth sounding. That’s why the Seattle founders are called the “Denny Party” – Denny was the one who didn’t work therefore he must be in charge…
Carson Boren became King County’s first sheriff. He was followed by a long line of distinguished sheriffy like folks including a Congress person named Dave Reichert or something. He looked better in a uniform.
We don’t know how King County got its original name but we know it’s now named after Martin Luther King Jr. The county name came about long before MLK was born. Want extra credit? Tell me how this happened.
Carson Boren died in 1912 in Woodinville. Really. But it wasn’t called Woodinville at that time. They must have named it because of the dead people or something. I don’t know. Don’t quote me on that.
Anyway, Carson was a known recluse and didn’t really like other members of his species. That’s probably why he wandered around so much. He had a wife or two and some kids so his dislike of people had limits.
I have not yet found out why they named a pond after him or why they insist on calling it a lake. But I do know it’s pretty and Glen, the Lake Boren Carp, enjoys living in it. Although lately he’s been seen more often in Elliott Bay chasing ferry boats. Maybe you’ve seen the reports on the national Teevee news. He’s checking for leaks.
Carson Boren was born in Nashville, Tennessee which is a town I’ve never been to. I don’t have a real desire to go there since I understand you can hear the ghost of Jonny Cash. I always disliked that guy. Now I’ve transferred that to Joaquin Phoenix because he played Cash in that awful movie. I’m so fickle.
If anyone has any idea why they named Lake Boren please let me know. I won’t believe you but it’s worth a try. Also, can you explain what Joaquin Phoenix as trying to do on Letterman? What a chump.
Well, you probably thought I knew nothing historical or, if you’ve been reading this blog you probably wondered if any of it was connected. Now you know. Seattle was founded by a few intrepid explorers who landed at Alki Beach and forgot how to get back to civilization.
These explorers provided a plethora of names for local landmarks, streets, and so on, yet we still often see stuff named Westlake, Eastlake, Westlake Center, South Center, North Gate, Overlake and so on. Newcastle even uses a name that was already used here twice before and lots of times elsewhere.
Come on people, we have hundreds of pioneers and even some in between people with good names to call stuff. For example I know of a real nice spot east of Chinook Pass that would benefit greatly from the name “Showalter Falls.” It’s fickle like me and quits in August.
Al
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Roads are Ready for the New Era:
Coal Creek Parkway is in the final paving stages. The Washington State paver has been made available and the asphalt trucks are lined up feeding the hopper. The new May Creek Bridge is just about done as well. Duval Avenue is supposed to open in July. Now I-405 overflow traffic can be backed up in four lanes rather than two.
Some of the Newcastle City Council recently decided it would be too convenient to allow traffic to smoothly flow from Bellevue to Renton and back so they approved an interim “Transit Center.” http://www.newcastletransitcenter.com/
The overhead view on the site shows a big green patch on the left. That’s the one acre site of the new multi use facility that may include a library, city hall, 80 unit low income housing, car wash, sushi bar, post office and disco. No parking.
Hence the requirement for a major bus/transit hub on the corner. Of course the artist’s cartoon on the click thru page makes it look like no cars will be there. The lower photo shows the bus stop as it is now including the back of the sign proclaiming that this is the site of the new library.
Speaking of libraries. Nearby neighbors in Newport Hills are getting a library pretty soon. A market closed not long ago and the Chevron station changed to a new location. Thus the Newport Hillbillies have a spot for a library. Newport Hills is part of Bellevue so it was not hard to get agreements, permits, contracts, designs, books, overdue letterheads, etc. Meanwhile the Newcastle library is still “in its planning stages.”
Soon Newcastle folks can get books at Newport Hills. This may be a bit confusing. Bellevue already has a “Newport Way” library not too far away. This is another example of how challenged people can get over naming stuff. Factoria is the center of the “Newport” name cluster but they didn’t call it “Newport Center” or even “Newport Factoria.”
Newport Hills is south of Factoria, Newport Way runs east from there, and Newport Shores is west. What’s “Newport?” Well, it’s a city in Rhode Island. They have a Bellevue Avenue – so that must be why Bellevue got all Newporty and named a bunch of stuff including a high school “Newport.”
But what about that Transit Center in Newcastle? I almost forgot. This work was initiated by Sound Transit because they got tired of waiting for the Newcastle City Council to agree on a real Transit Center on the shores of Lake Boren. Here’s a case where somebody actually had a name to call the lake.
It looks as if the plan may be to provide bus pockets where they can pull off the street and do the passenger exchanges without impeding traffic. Looks can be deceiving. From the plan view on the above web page it looks more like mostly trees and sidewalk. If they can’t pull off the main traffic lanes then what’s the big improvement?
But the good news is the Washington Mutual Bank has been renamed Chase. That way once you get off the bus and head for McDonald’s you can stop by the bank and pick up some cash. Just don’t wear a hat because it’s not legal to enter a bank with a hat on. Just leave it on the bus.
The point here is that after the transit improvements have been made to Newcastle Way they might begin construction on the new library complex, sans a library since there’s one in Newport Hills. We can’t live without construction.
Meanwhile the Newcastle Think Tank is still working on the conceptual design of the East Lake Boren Transit Center project. It’s pretty much going to remain conceptual for the next decade or so, I imagine.
If you like retaining walls and drainage ponds you should visit the Coal Creek Parkway site in August or later. It’ll all be done except for the stuff that’s not finished. They may rename it the “Newport Connector” or something.
A Note to Readers:
I’m running low on ways to say new things and still provide updates on old things. Municipal projects such as light rail, bus tunnels, and roadway improvements are interesting to me and I like to see what’s going on. After all I’m paying my share of it. But is it still interesting to you? Let me know if you’d like to hear about other kinds of projects. Or projects I haven’t heard about. I’d be just as interested in finding new stuff going on. For example the work on I-405 that’s got the Tukwila (pronounced Tuck-something) stretch all boogered up. Here’s your chance to let me hear from you. How do you like the photo at the top? For example...
Al
Some of the Newcastle City Council recently decided it would be too convenient to allow traffic to smoothly flow from Bellevue to Renton and back so they approved an interim “Transit Center.” http://www.newcastletransitcenter.com/
The overhead view on the site shows a big green patch on the left. That’s the one acre site of the new multi use facility that may include a library, city hall, 80 unit low income housing, car wash, sushi bar, post office and disco. No parking.
Hence the requirement for a major bus/transit hub on the corner. Of course the artist’s cartoon on the click thru page makes it look like no cars will be there. The lower photo shows the bus stop as it is now including the back of the sign proclaiming that this is the site of the new library.
Speaking of libraries. Nearby neighbors in Newport Hills are getting a library pretty soon. A market closed not long ago and the Chevron station changed to a new location. Thus the Newport Hillbillies have a spot for a library. Newport Hills is part of Bellevue so it was not hard to get agreements, permits, contracts, designs, books, overdue letterheads, etc. Meanwhile the Newcastle library is still “in its planning stages.”
Soon Newcastle folks can get books at Newport Hills. This may be a bit confusing. Bellevue already has a “Newport Way” library not too far away. This is another example of how challenged people can get over naming stuff. Factoria is the center of the “Newport” name cluster but they didn’t call it “Newport Center” or even “Newport Factoria.”
Newport Hills is south of Factoria, Newport Way runs east from there, and Newport Shores is west. What’s “Newport?” Well, it’s a city in Rhode Island. They have a Bellevue Avenue – so that must be why Bellevue got all Newporty and named a bunch of stuff including a high school “Newport.”
But what about that Transit Center in Newcastle? I almost forgot. This work was initiated by Sound Transit because they got tired of waiting for the Newcastle City Council to agree on a real Transit Center on the shores of Lake Boren. Here’s a case where somebody actually had a name to call the lake.
It looks as if the plan may be to provide bus pockets where they can pull off the street and do the passenger exchanges without impeding traffic. Looks can be deceiving. From the plan view on the above web page it looks more like mostly trees and sidewalk. If they can’t pull off the main traffic lanes then what’s the big improvement?
But the good news is the Washington Mutual Bank has been renamed Chase. That way once you get off the bus and head for McDonald’s you can stop by the bank and pick up some cash. Just don’t wear a hat because it’s not legal to enter a bank with a hat on. Just leave it on the bus.
The point here is that after the transit improvements have been made to Newcastle Way they might begin construction on the new library complex, sans a library since there’s one in Newport Hills. We can’t live without construction.
Meanwhile the Newcastle Think Tank is still working on the conceptual design of the East Lake Boren Transit Center project. It’s pretty much going to remain conceptual for the next decade or so, I imagine.
If you like retaining walls and drainage ponds you should visit the Coal Creek Parkway site in August or later. It’ll all be done except for the stuff that’s not finished. They may rename it the “Newport Connector” or something.
A Note to Readers:
I’m running low on ways to say new things and still provide updates on old things. Municipal projects such as light rail, bus tunnels, and roadway improvements are interesting to me and I like to see what’s going on. After all I’m paying my share of it. But is it still interesting to you? Let me know if you’d like to hear about other kinds of projects. Or projects I haven’t heard about. I’d be just as interested in finding new stuff going on. For example the work on I-405 that’s got the Tukwila (pronounced Tuck-something) stretch all boogered up. Here’s your chance to let me hear from you. How do you like the photo at the top? For example...
Al
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